to my sullivan love on his fourth birthday

Oh my funny valentine... You are (sigh)...You are like the warmest sweet breeze on my cold heart.

You are the absolute picture of tenderness.

View More: http://wildflowersphotos.pass.us/george
View More: http://wildflowersphotos.pass.us/george
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George Family-George Family faves-0144
View More: http://wildflowersphotos.pass.us/george
View More: http://wildflowersphotos.pass.us/george

Your heart spills out love on all around you.

Pictures above by Joy Prouty

Pretty much every single time I tell someone about you, I tear up.  Because you, my dear, you nearly weren't with us.

I don't look back on your birthwith fuzzy feelings but instead feel a panic in my heart as I remember when they took your limp body to the side to get you to breathe.  I don't remember much until early the next morning when I was finally mentally able to get it together to hold you and nurse you and look at you.

And then we fell in love...

Following 2 pictures by Joy Prouty

View More: http://wildflowersphotos.pass.us/george
View More: http://wildflowersphotos.pass.us/george
View More: http://wildflowersphotos.pass.us/george
View More: http://wildflowersphotos.pass.us/george
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You were born after the hardest year of our lives.  Deaths and miscarriage and illness and just pure sadness.  And you were our breath of warm air and as I often refer to you, the balm of my broken heart.

You are my snuggler and every single day, you need it...just like I do.

Waking up to, "Oh mama, you're so warm (pronounced waaaa-ymmmmm).  Let's snuggle" is kind of the best.

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This year, you wore you bike helmet everywhere and I just ate it up.

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You dote on your big brother to a fault.  I honestly can't believe how willing you are to share and give to him when he is so mean to you sometimes!  But you are.  You regularly give your very best "things" to him.  

You are FUNNY.  Like naturally hilarious and you don't even try.

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I've love love loved seeing you be a big brother to LM this year.  Barclay is in school most of the day and you are really stepping up to the plate.  You are so gentle with her and have actually started playing with her.  It melts my heart!

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Your favorite activity IN THE WORLD is to light and relight a candle to blow out.  

Your best buddy is Jude and ya'll just crack me up together.  You pretty much never fight.

Actually come to think of it, you pretty much never fight with anyone (other than Barclay).

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You're a lover.  A valentine in the flesh.    

You are painfully handsome and your big brown eyes are like bottomless inkwells.  And you can basically get away with anything if you slow blink your thick lashes at me.

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Your new thing this year is helping me cook.  You are very helpful with anything I ask you for and I think you'll make someone a pretty rad husband one day!

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Sullivan, your heart is one of the most beautiful hearts.  You allow me to feel things with you,emotionally, that my other babies don't.  You have that deep, slow passion inside of you like I do.  I think you are a work of art and I cannot wait to see you grow this next year.

Thank you for never denying me a tender hug or ever letting me go a day without hearing your contagious giggle.

I'm so glad I'm your mama.