to barclay on his sixth birthday

Oh my darling boy...My first born baby, 6 years ago they placed you into my arms.

I don't exactly want to say it went by so fast, because in a way I cannot remember life without you in it.

More so, I think I'm astounded by how much you've grown and changed since I first met you.

I thought, as a first time parent that I would shape you...but my dearest one, you have shaped me.

You have taught me everything I know about being a mother.  It has been hard at times.  I have wanted to run far away, at times.  But it is the most worthy thing I have ever done.

This year was a big year for you.

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You started kindergarten at a spanish emersion program in our local school.

I was so afraid.

I felt so guilty that I was maybe ruining you.

Or that our lack of nature journaling free living homeschooling would make you hate learning.

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But you flew!  You took off and love learning so much.  Your teachers say you run into school every single day eager and full of sunshine.

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You grew out of your very loved 2T clothing just in the past few months.  You're a tiny spitfire of a boy (just like your mama).

You love dressing yourself and proudly march into public wearing the craziest outfits.  I love that.  I love letting you do your thing.

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I cannot believe how much you and Sullivan fight and yet how tenderly you love each other.  You look out for each other.  Ever since Sullivan was born you've shared a room and it was NOT EASY.  As soon as we move into a house big enough for each of you to have your own room, you refuse to sleep anywhere but wrapped up in eachother's arms.

I'm completely in love with it.

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You love Lucy Miller.  You squeal with delight at her new tricks and tell anyone who will listen that your baby can walk, or your baby can talk.  You carry her around (maybe a little too much for my liking), but you are vigilant about taking legos out of her mouth and making sure she is happy.  I love watching you hold her.

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I see glimmers of myself in you.

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You just keep getting better.  Even though part of my heart sinks at the thought of leaving milestones in our wake, you honestly just keep getting better.

These are some of my favorite things about you now:

Your freckles.

Your facial expressions.

Your deep questions about life and God.

Your care for others and your justice loving heart.

How much you don't care what anyone thinks of you.

I love when you get so lost in play that you just babble on and on.

I love watching you write letters and art projects, you are so very serious and concentrated and your tiny tongue sticks out on the side, like it always has.

View More: http://wildflowersphotos.pass.us/george
View More: http://wildflowersphotos.pass.us/george

You are a miraculous work dear Barclay.

I am just giddy for the year ahead and seeing how you grow and what you will do.

I'm so glad you know how much I love you,

Your Mama

View More: http://wildflowersphotos.pass.us/george
View More: http://wildflowersphotos.pass.us/george

Last two photos by the artist Joy Prouty.

www.helenjoy.com